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Monday, May 16, 2016

Weight Loss Journey Week 9

This week I lost an additional 1 pound. 

Slowly but surely the weight will come off. It's not a sprint, it's a journey and it takes time. I'm also choosing to do this in a healthy way.
I ended up popping the blister and wow was there a lot of fluid in it. Now I just need to keep the area clean and hope it doesn't get infected. 

The good thing is that I have joined a team to get 10,000 steps in per day. This has been a huge motivation for me and so far I've met the challenge consistently. If I don't have enough steps in at the end of the day, I either ride my exercise bike or walk more until I've met my 10K steps. It's great motivation.

Here are my nutrition totals for the past week. I don't think I'll continue to post my meal plan unless you want to see it week after week. It's pretty consistent. But, if you want to see it - leave a comment and I'll continue to post my daily meals.
Unfortunately I caused a little drama in my team leadership. As I indicated last week, our team is falling apart and most have quit participating. My leader asked me if I had any ideas on motivating the team. My response wasn't very nice but here it is:
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I don't have a clue on how to get this team motivated. I don't know if you saw the message I gave to all the inactive members last week. Here is what I posted on their sparkpage: 

"their name", we need you! 

 Team Cruisin’ For Losin”, we need to rally together. We need all 22 of you to join in the discussion page, support each other, and post your numbers. We are half way through the challenge and we all need to be active. Let’s do this! We need everyone on our team to join in the weekly challenges, help us post our numbers. So, If you’ve been absent, we are begging you to rejoin the challenges and conversations. We miss the members of our team that are absent. Please come back and join us. It’s much more fun to do this together. We need you! 

I don't know if you really want to know what I think about this team, but I'll tell you. 

This team has completely broken my spirit. The reason I went into total depression and just didn't care last week was because of this team and the leaders. Sorry if this hurts your feelings. Last Saturday when the Optionals were posted -- I just said forget it and ordered a pizza. I crashed bad because why should I try to succeed on this team when I just can't win. 

When I started on this team I was gung ho. I was so excited and just posted everything I did. Then when it was posted that the "Optionals were not a competition", I thought maybe I am over doing it. I looked at what other people - the winners were doing and trying to emulate them and tried to do better for the team every week. Every week, my motivation got weaker and weaker to post stuff because I felt like I might be hurting people's feelings - that is why I was being shunned. 

I am so mad that no matter how much I work on the challenges, cheer others on and try to stay active on this team I am never recognized on the ATC / Optionals. It wasn't until last week when you caught up on a cheer message of the weekly results. 

However, the Optional winners send me in a rage every week. No matter how I try to improve and succeed on this team I am never a winner. Do you really think that I don't go and compare my results to the winners? 

The same people win every time: 

Wk 1: Hollystormcloud, Bontazzie, Kamee720 
Wk 2: Jiminyc's, Kamee720, Chance04 
Wk 3: Kamee720, Chance04, Hollystormcloud 
Wk 4: Kamee720, Hollystormcloud, JiminyC 

Wk 5: All week it was just me and Chance04 working on the optional challenge. I thought maybe, just maybe I'll be a winner. But, no - at the end of the week (Wed) more team members put their numbers in. And low and behold, I still can't be a winner because "Everyone is a winner". 

I wasn't even going to post my optional page this week until Tuesday because this whole competition is all about being in the inside click - maybe previous team members ... I just truly don't understand. 

Also, one last thing. I have never understood why you and Linda never fill out a form and join in with the challenges. I don't understand this team at all. Why should I be motivated to participate when our leaders don't and when you are not recognized for what you do. 

I decided that I would find other teams to join to get motivation from and thank goodness for me, I found a great team - where I can post and work on the goals for myself and not for a team that no one really participates in except for the clicky winning girls. 

I don't know, but I absolutely hate this team and this challenge. I am doing this journey for me and not the team anymore. I am not a quitter and always measure up to any commitment I make, so I will finish out this challenge. But, I will never join one again. It has completely broken my spirit being on this team. 
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What I found out was that I was posting my score for the optional challenge in the wrong place and even though the form was completely filled out to the max, the leader didn't look at what I did but only where the score was supposed to be logged and didn't question that there wasn't a score posted. 

Basically, even though there have only been 2 -7 people joining in the challenges, the leaders haven't even noticed what we were doing. To me that says a lot about how engaged our leaders have been on the team and why it has fallen apart. I feel really sad that they never noticed that I was filling out the form incorrectly after 6 weeks of participating. They should have caught my error on the 1st or 2nd week and guided me on how a new person to the team wasn't filling out the form correctly. It's very frustrating on my part. I'm also assuming that others have felt the same problem and just quit. 

I also realize that being a leader is volunteer and not a paid position, but if you volunteer, you need to do the job and keep the team motivated. 

I didn't want to cause drama, but after they realized that they had been shunning me, they apologized in front of the whole team causing me total embarrassment. I just wanted to be part of the team and recognized as doing my part.  

Here is what was placed on the team page: "My apologies to Think2BFit...I need to spend a little more time reading all of the posts in the optionals. I honestly did not see the score posted at the top. She has been scoring nearly perfect scores each and every week, and she needs to be acknowledged for her great work!!! Everyone give her a great big cheer!!! She deserves it!!! Woo!!Hoo!!!"

This week when the winners of the optionals came through I was the winner:
Since everyone has finished posting in the optionals, here are the results:
First: Think2BFit
Second: HollyStormCloud
Third: 2 BSXYKitten
Other winners were: Kamee, Chance, CBrinkley.. Everyone is a winner that participates in optionals. Optionals help all of stay focused on the week. Great Job to everyone and keep up the good work!!!

Anyway, I'm better now and have gotten over the embarrassment. I will continue to participate in the next 2 weeks of the challenge and then I won't sign up for another. It's just not been motivating for me - but something that has caused me frustration which leads to food comfort. I'd rather be on a team that motivates me and where I can just compete against myself. 

2 more weeks of the challenge and I'll move on with my journey on my own. I do love SparkPeople and having the tools to track nutrition and fitness for free. I also love the many teams to motivate you. Really, it's a great free program for my weight loss journey. 

I can do this!

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